Not Knocking, Just Challenging

1 Peter 3:3-4-- “Your adornment must not be merely external...but let it be the hidden person of the heart…”
Heart in Greek is kardia. It refers to the imagination/morality/understanding of the mind. In Hebrew, the similar concept for heart is lebab. Deuteronomy 6:4 says “Love the LORD your God with all your heart (kol lebab), all your soul (kol nephesh), and all your strength (kol m’od). A word study on lebab/kardia reveals the heart is unique to humankind. Therefore, “the hidden person of the heart is also unique to humankind.
This matters to me because I struggle with body image. Like so many women, the external person of the physical body becomes an idol. It becomes the thing that matters most: exercise and you’ll be thinner, eat healthy and you’ll lose weight, wear that brand to make your butt look better, use this make-up and you’ll look sexier, spend a fortune on skincare so you look younger...
It’s a bombardment and assault on the heart. Over and over we are flooded with images and ideas that scream: YOU ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH THE WAY GOD MADE YOU! DO THIS, USE THAT AND YOU CAN ACHIEVE GODLINESS...oh yeah...but it doesn’t involve God.
Sounds just like Genesis 3. The serpent assured woman that she would be more like God if she ate the fruit. But eating the fruit meant she could be like God, without God. “Made in the image of God” was not enough to be like God. Humankind chose idolatry: they chose something that would fill a need where they believed God would not.
1 Peter 3:3-4 reminds me that I am enough just the way I am. I am not enough because of anything I have done. I am enough because of what Jesus Christ ALREADY DID. My external body will fade and wither...but the inner person of my lebab/kardia will remain. That is who I want to invest in. She is who I can focus my beauty regime time/energy on.

I am NOT KNOCKING any skincare folks or fitness gurus...just challenging my brothers and sisters in Christ to evaluate why. An idol is ANYTHING that we say, "yes...this will satisfy me where God does not." Remember, the LORD God is our refuge and our strength.

The Wind Poem

It started as a breeze, gently moving loose strands of hair across my face. These common breezes rarely build so suddenly to a gale. Rather, they offer comfort to cool from hard work.
They sweep their hands across the grassy pastures making earth move like sea. Round leaves catch light and twinkle like gowns of sequence.
A light breeze chases away mosquitoes.
When the young fruit trees start to bend I wonder if I staked them well enough. I watch how flexible they are, dancing in the wind, bending low as they get jostled.
Seed heads of the milkweeds burst open, releasing hundreds of seeds into the sky.
So one day, after the breeze blew away the mosquitoes, and the young fruit trees were bending, I jumped into the wind with the milkweed seed.
I let the wind carry me where it wanted.
At first, I was terrified. then exhilarated. then apprehensive. then relieved. then terrified again.
The wind carried me away from my home and my land. Under my feet, flew birds. I looked down and realized that what I was doing was quite unnatural for a human.
Panic set in, my arms started flapping. Maybe I thought it was up to me to fly. But humans can't fly. I wasn't flying. I am not a bird.
As I fought the air current, I realized to my horror, that I had no control of the wind. It was stronger than me. It could smash me to the ground in an instant.
Suddenly, I was falling.
As I fell, I felt no breeze. The hair didn't even tickle my face.
I cursed myself for being so foolish as to jump into the gale.
And then, I contemplated the irony of birds under my feet. So I laughed and readied myself for the end of me.
But I didn't end.

The wind swooped me over the grassy pastures. We made waves over the earth as if it were sea.We wore gowns of twinkling leaves. And my feet never touched the ground again.

Living and Decaying

For the creation was subjected to futility, not by its own will, but because of the One who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until the present time… (Romans 8:20-22)

I have an old dog. Jack is almost 15 years old. That’s a long life for a black lab. Owning a dog is more than simply caring for the creature’s need. Jack has been a constant companion and faithful soul. I got him before I married, before kids, before seminary and launching a non-profit. After God, Jack has personally witnessed more of my life changes than any other living being.
He mostly lays around these days; shivering at room temperature. His hearing is virtually gone. His eyes can barely see although they still hold a kind and good expression. He manages to pull himself up to a stand and gingerly walk outside to void a couple times a day. His back legs are terribly atrophied from years of arthritis.
I sit on the floor to hold his head in my lap and rub his tired old muscles. I say, “You’re still the best dog.” He understands.
I remember when my sweet old Jack was young and vibrant. I remember when his coat had more luster and his legs didn’t shake. I remember running with him, playing in rivers, watching him leap to catch frisbees in the air. But now his skin is thin and his ribs stick out. He can’t even squat to relieve himself without collapsing from exertion.
Jack is dying. As he lives, he decays. He is creation groaning together with the whole of creation. And I know to the core of my soul, that his suffering is my fault.
Sin entered the world through humankind, ushering in a curse over the whole of creation. Decay and death are not the way it’s supposed to be. Yet here we all exist: living and decaying. The sin of one infected all humanity with sin. Sin was imputed to us. But Jesus Christ’s righteousness is imputed to all those who believe:
Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.6 You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly...Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, and in this way death came to all people, because all sinned—13 To be sure, sin was in the world before the law was given, but sin is not charged against anyone’s account where there is no law.14 Nevertheless, death reigned from the time of Adam to the time of Moses, even over those who did not sin by breaking a command, as did Adam, who is a pattern of the one to come.15 But the gift is not like the trespass. For if the many died by the trespass of the one man, how much more did God’s grace and the gift that came by the grace of the one man, Jesus Christ, overflow to the many! (Romans 5)
Without Jesus, there is no hope, no freedom from the bonds of sin (Rom. 6). But a relationship with the Lord means that even though current creation decays and wastes away, the faithful will one day live in a new creation (Isaiah 43:18-19; Ephesians 2; Revelation 21:5).
I have faith in Jesus Christ as my savior and I entrust my soul to His care. I don’t know where Jack’s soul will go to after his body fully gives out here on earth. But I trust that God loves His creation more than I do and He has a good plan for all His animals. In the meantime, I will continue to strive to help creation live up to its full potential as I live and decay with them...even if that means doggie diapers for a geriatric pup.


Jack the dog with his family.

My Psalms 136

Psalms 136 is a psalm of praise. The concept of praise is "to speak of His name." (For more on psalms, I highly recommend Dr. Ronald Allen's And I Will Praise Him: A Guide to Worship in Psalms).

So, I WILL SPEAK OF HIS NAME and tell you what God has done in my life, just like the psalmist recounted what God had done in the life of Israel.



Give thanks to the LORD for He is good
His love endures forever

Give thanks to the God of gods
His love endures forever

Give thanks to the LORD of lords
His love endures forever

To Him who alone does great wonders
His love endures forever

Who by His understanding made the heavens
His love endures forever

Who spread out the earth upon the waters
His love endures forever

Who made the great lights
His love endures forever

The sun to govern the day
His love endures forever

The moon and the stars to govern the night
His love endures forever

To Him who brought justice
His love endures forever

Who provided for my mom and her children
His love endures forever

when her husband left, the children abandoned
His love endures forever

the church, His body and bride loved her and her children
His love endures forever

To Him who counseled
His love endures forever

Who gives a new song
His love endures forever

restores my broken with kindness and gentleness
His love endures forever

To God who gave me a husband and children
His love endures forever

provided a place to dwell and a way
His love endures forever

to glorify His great name through creation
His love endures forever

a farm, a time, a space
His love endures forever

Never will He leave me, never will He forsake me
His love endures forever

Who freed us from our enemy
His love endures forever

and who gives food to every creature
His love endures forever

Give thanks to the God of heaven
His love endures forever

The Scared Space of Stories

I get to sit and rock on my porch with many people. 

Oftentimes, we are snuggling a rabbit or holding a newborn baby goat or gently nesting a chick in our hand while the other hand is free to hold a cuppa...

It is in these shared spaces of sipping tea and nurturing little creatures, stories are shared.

These stories are neither fairy tales nor folklore...they are human stories. Stories of suffering, endurance, and pain. They are stories written on the ragged, bloodied, and torn pages of the lives of broken people. Some of these people are survivors of human trafficking. Others are teenagers who wear sleeves of scars from self harm. There are abused women who dare to breath out the darkness beaten into them. There are children who innocently describe an atrocity as if it were common knowledge all humanity experiences. 

I sit and listen. Pleading with God in my mind and heart to heal these precious ones. Sometimes it is not appropriate to weep as stories are shared. I have learned to breath through these stories, assuring my heart that later we can weep and mourn and lament this moment with God privately. But for that moment, that human sharing their story needs me present and listening, not overcome by emotion...

If I weep, then they will know their story hurts me. If they are distracted by my pain, they cannot get out their own pain. They will not be comforted, but rather, they will get confirmation that their story is too overwhelming to be dealt with. More walls will go up and more pain and more darkness and more isolation will overcome them.

The Bible instructs us to "mourn with those who mourn" (Rom. 12:15). If the person sharing the story is not mourning, that is, they are not actively grieving (either because they have all ready grieved, they don't want to grieve, or they are unaware it is grievous), it is not my time to mourn. Because in that situation, if I mourn without them, than I am only mourning for myself and I do not "mourn with those who mourn." 

However, if they get to a safe and sacred space to weep, I weep with them. I don't hold back. I am present on the ash heap of their despair.

As I go along in the care farm ministry, I find value permitting my heart and mind to release the pain and seek comfort from Jesus. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 says,

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God."

If I am a comfort at all to those who share their stories in that sacred space of my porch, it is only because I am learning to let God comfort me. 

I get to share my stories in a scared space with the LORD. Oftentimes, I am snuggling a rabbit or holding a newborn baby goat or gently nesting a chick in my hand while the other hand is free to hold a cuppa...

The Woman, the Rock, the Person

A Woman once went walking

And discovered a person pinned beneath a large rock.

The person was alive, but barely breathing. There was a small pocket under the rock where they had curled under to avoid being crushed.

"HELP!" the Woman cried out, "This person is stuck!"

She tried to move the rock herself, but she couldn't make it budge.

She laid down in the dirt to hold their hand, assuring them she wouldn't leave, offering comfort and hope that soon they'd find relief.

The Woman, then, heard someone approaching. It was a man who loved the gym. He worked out everyday and it showed. The Woman was relieved! Finally, someone strong enough to help her move the rock.

"Please, come quick! There's someone trapped under this rock..." she pleaded.

When the strong man came upon them, he replied, "This person should have known better than to let that rock crush them. Look at me, I know to use my knees and not my back. They'll need to learn their lesson just like I did." And he walked away.

Soon after, the Woman heard someone else approaching. It was another man, but this man was an older gentleman carrying a laptop bag. He was a professor. The Woman was relieved! Finally, someone knowledgeable enough to help her move the rock.

"Please, come quick! There's someone trapped under this rock..." she pleaded.

When the professor came upon them, he replied, "I will design the best contraption for lifting the rock off of them. It will be a spectacular invention and will help many people lift rocks off themselves, but it will take several years to get the design, the patent, and then build it...but I'll come back then!" And he walked away.

It was getting late. The person asked the Woman for some food and water, which she promptly provided. She laid down in the dirt, holding the person's hand, assuring them help would come soon.

Finally, the Woman heard a vehicle approaching. It was a man in a tow truck. The Woman was relieved! Finally, someone with the right equipment to help her move the rock.

"Please, come quick! There's someone trapped under this rock..." she pleaded.

When the man in the tow truck came upon them, he replied, "I ain't helping that fag! Look at that arm! Clearly some effeminate freak. God hates them kind!" Then he raped the Woman and drove away.

Night was approaching. The Woman laid down in the dirt again to hold the hand of the person trapped under the rock.

She felt ashamed. She felt like a failure. She felt hopeless.

She prayed and wept. Her tears turning the dust to mud. She wanted to die. She wanted to bury herself with that person buried under the rock.

She started digging. Digging her grave, she thought.

She started digging down into the dirt and scooped piles away touching the person's arm. Then it occurred to her.

The Woman kept digging. She dug down and moved earth under the person's shoulders. Then she could get under the body to dig away earth under their back and legs. Her nails broke to pieces as she clawed through the ground.

She crawled out from under the person and gently but firmly pulled them out from under the rock.

She wiped the dirt from their face
And found it was Herself.

What is a Care Farm?

Ever wonder what we do at Simple Sparrow care farm? Watch this short video to learn more:
https://youtu.be/QR1Rs0WWE7Y