Yesterday I was feeling low. My pet down thoughts I think about myself were fierce. They said, "You're not enough, you'll never be enough, and you'll fail."
These thoughts never have great timing. Especially yesterday, because last night I was invited to present on Simple Sparrow for a local philanthropic vignette, designed to introduce new non-profits to local investors. The responsibility to accurately communicate our mission and vision and seek financial support to expand our work was heavy.
"It's up to me, but what if I fail," I asked my husband.
"Then you'll live and learn how to do better next time." He is in the habit of consoling me with sharp discernment and general amazing-ness.
The vignette was a gathering of all the important people in the city, many who have their names on buildings and signs. Three non-profits were given 10 minutes each to present who they were, what they do, and why they need more money. I presented last, which gave me more time to dread but also more time to think and pray.
While I listened to the presenters, I thought back through this year and how quickly Simple Sparrow grew:
Summer 2017, Marti Smith (OTR/L and co-founder) called me up to formally ask permission to share about my farm. My farm, Simple Sparrow Farm, was my hobby farm. It was a small, 2 acre haven where I worked the ground, grew things, and added animals to my delight. Having 4 children, I tamed the animals to be gentle and well mannered so as not to hurt them. Having animals, I tamed my children to be gentle and well mannered so as not to hurt them. Marti liked the farm because 1) we were friends and our time together was always fun 2) she brought clients out for therapy. We discovered that people enjoyed therapy at the farm, finding it meaningful, functional, and fun. So Marti shared about my farm at trauma/sensory integration conferences in Texas, Illinois, Canada, and Norway.
Later Summer 2017, I stream-lined the website (www.simplesparrow.farm) and thought about what to do next. I figured a good place to start was introducing myself locally before Marti introduced me globally. But how to introduce myself? And what was Simple Sparrow Farm anyway? What was my mission and vision? So much adulting had to happen before introductions. I decided to start with "The Farm Project," an art project purposed to bring the "farm" back to the city. But who would display the art?
September 2017 I walked into a quaint little cafe in Georgetown, Sweet Lemon Kitchen and Inn. They had converted an old farmhouse and "The Farm Project" fit perfectly...at least I thought so, but I needed to get owner approval. I met the manager, owner, and interior decorator. They loved my art. Their support ignited my passion. Their excitement inspired me to do more.
I was starting a new semester at Dallas Theological Seminary, working towards an MACL. I assumed I would use my degree in women's ministry at our church. However, we believed God was calling us out of that church to begin searching for church closer to the farm. I was in a funk. Because starting a new semester at seminary, I didn't have a church, I didn't have a ministry, and didn't understand why God called me to seminary to spend a crazy amount of money and time. But God knew...
As I reviewed the syllabus for Strategic Ministerial Planning, it occurred to me that Simple Sparrow Farm could possibly be a parachurch ministry. But then I thought, "How ridiculous is that? A farm ministry...who ever heard of such a thing..."
Then again, I do need to finish this semester project assignment, so why not? As I deliberated and attempted to convince God "farm ministry" was not my calling, I had a chance meeting at my kids' school. The new principal was in the office one morning when I dropped my kids off. The secretaries and I had become friends through the years.
"Mrs. Gande, you need to meet Mrs. Tanner! She's the one who has the farm with the animals! She's the one who brought the animals into school last year!"
I was caught off guard. I had indeed brought animals into school on different occasions for education and emotional support. My favorite time was after goat kids were born. The previous principal, Mr. Dyer, made an announcement over the PA: "Students, there are new kids at school today. They will be coming around to visit your class, but please don't touch them until Mrs. Tanner says it's okay." We carried the baby goat kids around and the human kids were absolutely delighted! I would share stories about the animals too, like how a turkey hen hatched and raised a duck, chick, and guinea fowl like they were her own. I pointed out how human families are made like that too. My animal shinanigans and stories had apparently become known in the school district.
"Mrs. Tanner," Jane the secretary said, "we are starting morning TV announcements, can you bring in your animals to talk about them like you did last year?"
I was humbled by the influence the animals and I had on students. The invitation to present regularly on announcements was an honor. More opportunity to share farm in the city was laid at my feet...
October 2017 I had the bare bones of Simple Sparrow outlined: Mission, Vision, Core Values etc. My planning course forced me to strategically think through and build a ministry. My TA and prof gave me excellent feedback and encouraged me to look into becoming an actual non-profit. Friends and family I shared my plans with encouraged me too. One friend (Rachel) even had a friend (Sara) who had helped start a non-profit, so I met with Sara to get the scoop.
Sara and I had met previously, but it was only ever with Rachel present. This time, Sara and I sat down to breakfast and I asked her how all the non-profit stuff works. She explained the paper work, tax applications, hiring an attorney, payments...more grown up things. My eyes glazed over and I decided now wasn't the time to launch a non profit I was inventing. But then God moved...
Sara must have read my mind (or my doubtful expression) because she said, "Jamie, Rachel has told me about what you do at your farm...I want to pay to hire an attorney and I'll file all the paperwork..." The reality of her words sank to my heart. The joy could not be contained and poured out of my eyes.
"Sara, you don't need to offer this...that's huge...I can save and in a couple years I can apply later...I don't even know if this is anything..."
"Jamie," she said, her joy pouring out of her eyes too, " I am financially able to do this. I am not gifted like you to work with animals or teach people about them...but I can do this. Let me."
More joy. God was opening a door and I jumped through it.
November 2017 Sara and I met with the non-profit attorney. I had nearly completed my Simple Sparrow Ministerial Plan for school, and therefore, was prepared to give the attorney everything she needed to start the application process. The attorney informed us that 501c3 status is not always granted and if our application was accepted, it could take 9-24 months to get the official status. So we settled in to wait, hoping for approval. When Sara asked about how/when to pay the attorney fees, she replied, "You know, I am so confident Simple Sparrow will get approval, and I am touched that Sara is paying out of pocket for my fees, I'll waive my fees until you get your official approval. That way, it will be tax deductible donation." Wow.
December 4, 2017 we received our 501c3 status!
Whoosh! Into the new year...
